ISN's NBA MVP Watch Vol. 1
/We know it’s early, we don’t care! That’s why we’re starting the NBA MVP rankings right now. Members of ISN will give their MVP candidates as the season progresses. So let’s get started!
Kipp - Derrick Rose’s knees
“After watching him drop 50 on the Jazz, I was thoroughly convinced I had taken too many painkillers. It was nice for the MonStars to finally give him his powers back after 5 years. But just like Hulk Hogan having sex with another man’s wife, I don’t expect this to last.
Garland - Carmelo Anthony
“It takes a really special, valuable person to single-handedly ruin an entire team. What does Melo even do? He doesn’t rebound, he doesn’t rotate on defense, he doesn’t move off the ball, and he doesn’t wear condoms while having sex with strippers in New York… allegedly.
Anna Wilson Beth - Kevin Love
“The least shocking news of the season? Kevin Love is injured again. Expected to be out a month with a toe injury. His team is 0-6, the Cavs just fired head coach Tyronn Lue, and J.R. Smith wants a trade. And what has Kevin contributed to his team this year… not one damn thing.”
Izzy of the Forest - Adidas Dame 4
Jesse D. Garrabrant/NBAE via Getty Images
“Look at these! Definitely the MVP so far. Although they’re Damian Lillard’s shoe, these were worn by whoever Davis Bertans is. I fully endorse anyone wearing Mortal Kombat characters on their shoes. A+ work, Adidas!”
